Daily drudgery....

I should like to bring my daily drudge before you, O Lord - the long hours and days crammed with everything else but you. Look at this daily drudge, my gentle God, you who are merciful to us men and women for whom daily drudge is virtually all we are. Look at my soul, which is virtually nothing but a street on which the world's baggage cart rolls along with innumerable trivialities, with its gossip and fuss, with its noisiness and empty pretension.

A prayer of Karl Rahner!

To share joy.

Joy is meant to be shared. This is especially true in a religous context. The first Christians stood in awe before the mighty deeds of the apostles (Ac.2:43). They “feared” God. But this had nothing to do with anxiety and panic. We read in the same description that they broke bread with joy and that they praised God. In a simple way they experienced happiness when they had their meals together, but in the deeper, spiritual life, they could also praise God with much joy (Ac.2:47).

The sharing of joy is an essential characteristic of a community of believers. And it is fascinating to see how the church is formally structured to express this joy:

To worship God with hymns and song is one of the most important ways of expressing joy. Music, especially music that touches one, can make worship a special experience. People would remark after a service that the music was beautiful. They sing hymns with extraordinay enthusiasm when they are together in joy. When one sings special words with beautiful music it can inspire one and transform one in a deep spiritual manner. It is one of the most fitting ways to express joy in worshipping God. Then one is also truly celebrating the love of God as the true source of joy.

But joy is also communicated in proclaiming the Word of God. The preacher who lives from the gospel, the good, joyful news, will radiate joyful words. And it is not possible to communciate joy when one is innerly desperate, broken, without hope and overcome by depression. But to proclaim joy does not mean, however, that one has to smile all the time or that one has to feel happy all the while. It is a disaster when one wants to fake joy or to exaggerate one’s happiness.

Joy can be subdued, sober, simple. On Good Friday it is the death of Christ which is celebrated, remembered joyfully. On such a day joy is expressed differently than on the day of celebrating Christmas or Pentecost. When we say farewell to a loved one who has died, one can feel much joy amidst the sorrow of loss and bereavement. It is a joy because of having been blessed by the life and presence of the one who has died. It is joy because of so much happiness which we had shared with the one who has died.

Joy can be there, even in the times of great adversity, because of the never-ending presence of God in our lives. We can be joyful in sorrows, writes Paul in 2 Corinthians. He knew – he sang songs of joy in jail. Ultimately we feel joy because God shares divine blessings with us.

We feel happiness because we share it with the Other.

To see and taste God (Ps.34:9). What is mysticism?

There is little doubt who the great mystics in history are. A number of names immediately come to mind. There are Hildegard of Bingen and Bernard of Clairvaux from the 11th century, Meister Ekchart from the 13th century, Jan van Ruusbroec and Juliana of Norwich from the 14th century, Ignatius van Loyola from the 16th century and many others. These authors were key figures in the history of mysticism.

It is interesting that they are described as “mystics.” We read their texts and we know intuitively that they are about mysticism. But at the same time differences come to the fore as soon as we start discussing the nature of mysticism, It is clear that mysticism can be understood in different ways. Scholem (Die jüdische Mystik; 6-7)who wrote important publications on mysticism, thinks that we can begin to understand mysticism by noting the simple remark in Psalm 34:9. “Taste and seeing that the Lord is good.” Mysticism is about the intimate way in which the presence of God is experienced directly and immediately. The goodness of God is tasted and seen.


This verse makes us aware of what may seem like a contradiction. God who is so completely different than creation, can be so intimately in a relationship with creation that the divine goodness can be tasted and seen.

This focus on an intimate relationship with the divine is a general trend in mysticism. On the one hand mysticism has to do with what is unthinkable – it brings us before the divine which transcends our reality. It has to do with experiencing the divine presence. And then, secondly, this amazing phenomenon, that Creator and creation interact in an intimate way, is then to be expressed in human language.

Here we have to do with the conflict between mystical thought (human thoughts and words) and mystical experience (our experience of faith). We struggle with this already on a most elementary level when we triy to explain to others what happened when we experienced the divine touch.

I liked the Scholem’s remarks about this. He wanted to emphasise that people have a religious experience which is unique. It is an experience which transforms and changes everything. Someone is distanced from his or her own being (an ecstatic experience). It is an infinite experience. The inner being of someone is lifted up to the highest level (“den endlichen Aufschwung der Seele zur höchsten Stufe).

And yet Scholem writes, one should be careful about reducing mystical texts to this insight. There are some authors who do not like to speak of mysticism as "unification with God." They think that such an understanding eliminates the borders between God and humanity. They are wary of associating the mystical experience with the divinisation of a human being – something which is often the case in contemporary contexts in which pantheism has become so prominent.

This description of mysticism as unification is in any case very wide. There is not really something like an experience of unification with God in religions. This abstract formulation is an attempt to help us in a general way to understand mystical texts. In reality we have a mystical authors who wrote in language of the time about their experience of faith. Mysticism always has a specific character and context. We should therefore always ask how Jews, Buddhists, Muslims, Anglicans, Lutherans, Calvinists, wisdom teachers, rabbis, laity, monastics, Desert Fathers and any others spoke about their mystical experiences. It is similar to music. Music is about an octave of eight notes which produces sound and which has an impact on people. But music will sound very differently where Bono and U2 or a symphonic orhestra or a jazz band perform.

But there is also another important facet which must be emphasised. Anyone can play a few notes on the piano and think he or she is on the way to stardom. Music, however, is more than loosely connected notes. Mystics did not have a vague feeling of divine intervention or some relationship with God. They also did not have one or other vague feeling of divinisation. For them it was not a matter of a human being reaching an extraordinary state. They thought in the language of their time and context about the indescribable, unfathomable touch of God which transformed someone and changed his or her life completely. And each of them expressed their unique experience in a particular form.

Taken as example Jewish mysticism. Scholem writes that the early Jewish mystics never spoke of unification with God, although we could say that this is what their texts are about. It is a vital characteristic of Jewish mysticism that God remains completely different in the divine relationship with humanity. God is so overwhelmingly different that the one who sees God, dies – as is remarked in Hebrew Scriptures. And yet, mystics experienced God in an intimate manner. They spoke of special, personal experiences which brought them, in mystical ways, to seek God. Mystical authors would express fundamental experience in different ways according to the context and time.

An example of this would be Jewish mystics of the second century. They expressed their mystical experience of God in terms of language from their time and context. They used especially Isaiah 6 and Ezekiel 1 with their throne visions. In both these visions the visionaries stand in awe before the transcendent majesty and glory of God and experience their own unholy existience in an acute manner. The point is that, like Isaiah and Jeremiah, these mystics express their experience by speaking of their journey to the heavenl y regions and their presence before the throne of God. In these regions they are given heavenly secrets which are vitally important for their future existence. God is transforming them and bringing new life to them.

Later on, however, the Chassidim used much lesser symbolic language in their depiction of their mystical experiences. One of them explained his mystical experience as follows, “Many people serve God with their human understanding. Others, however, contemplate the divine ‘ nothingness.’ The special mystical experience given to people who are regarded as worthy, is beyond all human comprehension. But after this vision and experience of God en returns to one's normal state and comprehension, but now one is filled by divine glory.”


Mysticism is therefore not a simple matter of speaking about an encounter with God. It is a special experience which is expressed with much difficulty in human language. Where these texts are finally written down and read, they have an extraordinary impact. In them people recognise the deepest meaning of life. They contront the reader with the Mystery of our existence. It is only in the direct, mystical encounter with the divine that humanity finds complete peace.

Joy comes to those who search for it.

I met someone today who told me about his difficult times six years ago when he was involved in a divorce. Dark, depressive thoughts overshadowed his existence. Now, six years later, having met someone whom he loves greatly, he can hardly imagine those extremely negative experiences which brought his into a deep depression – they now seem so unreal to him.

In his life joy and sadness are clearly closely linked. Like many, as we saw in the blog yesterday, he also experienced how his life offers both its sad and its joyful moments. This is real: life is not only about joy. Faith is not only triumphant. It fails and it know unhappiness. At that time, though, he seemed to have lost this perspective. For him life was simply a prolonged, sad experience.

The point is whether we allow our sadness to overshadow our existence. Often we allow our deep thoughts to dominate what we feel and how we live. We cannot relativise our feelings. It is difficult to say to ourselves: “but one day there will be the good times again.”

Our life is about much more than the sadness and unhappiness that we must occasionally experience. Life is about denying sadness the upper hand. It is about challenging ourselves not to become a victim of our disappointments.

This is easier said than done. My friend would not have appreciated it if someone told him six years ago not to worry since there will be good times again in the future. He would not have liked to hear that he is too overwhelmed and obsessed by his negative feelings.

But then, what does one do in such times other than sharing one’s grief with God and thus moves away from grief? As we experience deep inner anguish and loneliness, we may feel abandoned by God and all else. But these negative feelings bring us to seek God so that we can be reunited with the divine presence.

On the one hand, one could accept such times as part of life and then see it as a challenge which one should face and which one should see as a time to be stripped from everything which keeps one from seeking God. This means letting our sadness go, allocating to them only a restricted place in our lives.

Or we can also see these times as the divine invitation to seek God as the Father who cares for those who are unhappy. One needs to enter the sphere of Fatherly love, to seek the intimate closeness to God, so that one can be touched by the divine joy. It may be difficult to seek God since we are so overwhelmed by our loneliness and sadness. We become so preoccupied by these negative feelings that it is difficult to break away from them.

And yet, this is what we need to do – to seek God’s presence which brings us inner peace and joy. For many who suffer such negative feelings, the road to healing will be steep. Searching in God does not always mean that we will experience joy instantly.

Most probably we shall find that our healing takes a long time and comes gradually. As we seek God in our sadness, it may be that we experience but one tiny moment of graceful joy and sense of belonging with God who cares for us, only to feel much sadness again. It is like a journey per foot on a road by night without any light. We walk carefully and haltingly. But then a car speeds by and we see that we are still on the right road and we recognize the direction in whcih we should travel. That one moment of light brings a sense of direction in our lives.The one moment of joy may bring the relief and begin the process of healing.

Relief from sadness does not always come easily. But when we search for it, we shall not be disappointed. Joy comes only to those who reach out to it....

Often as we walk through dark days, we despair. But then invariably, later on we say: if I now look back I can only say that it was by the grace of God....

Our sadness should not speak the last word in our lives.

On happiness. Joy does not fall from the sky.

This week one of the brave opponents of the apartheid system and a most respected journalist, decided to end his life. He shot himself, having told his friends that he was fed up with what was happening in our country. His death was front page news, with some of our most distinguished leaders appealing to those in power to understand that his death signals to hem how crime and corruption are driving people to acts of extreme desperation. There is in our land deep depression as our social fabric falls apart.

The journalist’s death affected me deeply. As a young man, I often felt inspired by his fearless stand against apartheid. When others in high moral positions supported a devastating racist political system, cut off all debates and ostracised those who dared to express dissent and opposition (him included), his lonely, brave voice gave us hope and strengthened us in our own opposition to the system. I respected the integrity with which he wrote and fought an often lonely battle against injustice – something he did throughout his life.

But I am writing this because of something else I read yesterday. I was reading a book by Anselm Grün on spirituality in which he writes about joy. He writes about the fact that our society knows so little joy and that we perpetuate and intensify our feelings of misery by our constant negative attitudes and pronouncements.

I kept on reflecting on what he writes – especially because joy is so vital. Joy in life is not just an emotion that makes our existence a pleasure or provides us with good feelings. Joy is a key to survival. If we lose our joy in life, we often arrive at a point where we completely give up on life.

As a contrast to this miserable situation, Grün draws attention to the fact that the Bible is full of feasts which are celebrated with much joy. For this one only has to read the Psalms. The deeper life of which the Bible speaks, is a life of joy.

But, and this is the point, life, even in the Bible is not merely about joy. The best Biblical symbols of this is the slavery in Egypt, the wearisome journey through the desert to the promised land, the cross and the suffering of the first Christian witnesses.What is true of the Bible, is simply also true of life. We experience in our everyday existence wonderful moments of joy, but then, in a moment, it can be taken away from us by one negative word, a news article, an angry look, a word of criticism or a seemingly insignificant event – all of which can makes us sad and miserable. Life has its beautiful moments, but also its moments of sadness.

Life does not only consist of joy. And religion has nothing to do with a permanent state of joy. Life is also sad. There are the moments, also for those with faith, that one wakes up and does not want to face the day ahead.

There are days when we have no courage, that we are lost in emotions of despair and fear. That we are angry, upset, violent. There are times that we get ill, fall in debt, worry about the future – all of which make us sad. There is no one who can escape this darker side of human existence. Even the most happy people experience moments of sadness.

The difference between the Bible with its happy and sad moments on the one hand and contemporary society with its misery, is that some people become victims of their sadness. When they look at life, sadness dominates and overshadows all moments of light – to the extent that the good no longer exists for them.

Others understand that life is much more than sadness. Why should one let the darker moments overshadow the moments of fulfillment, of joy, of meaning - however fleeting or small they may be? Why should one be conquered by fears and unhappiness? Life is ultimately about much more. It becomes a matter of perspective: does one look at sadness as the end of happiness or does one look as sadness which happens, but which is ultimately overshadowed by happiness.

One can become so obsessed with darkness and depression, that one succumbs to them and is destroyed by them. Despair becomes a spiral movement in which one is constantly drawn deeper and deeper. In Biblical times believers somehow managed in their darkest moments to hold on to the light, the deeper things that really matter. In jail, engulfed by darkness, Paul and Silas sang songs of joy at midnight, the darkest time of the night. Their secret was that they sang hymns “to God” (Ac.16:25). They were aware of the divine presence in their midst – something which transformed their situation.

It was the same Paul who advised his readers to be joyful. But he knew he had to add, quite tellingly, that they needed to rejoice “in the Lord” (Phil4:4). And, finally, he also added, that they should rejoice “always.” It was a challenge to them – he knew such joy has to be sought. It does not fall from the sky.

On happiness. Joy does not fall from the sky.

This week one of the brave opponents of the apartheid system and a most respected journalist, decided to end his life. He shot himself, having told his friends that he was fed up with what was happening in our country. His death was front page news, with some of our most distinguished leaders appealing to those in power to understand that his death signals to hem how crime and corruption are driving people to acts of extreme desperation. There is in our land deep depression as our social fabric falls apart.

The journalist’s death affected me deeply. As a young man, I often felt inspired by his fearless stand against apartheid. When others in high moral positions supported a devastating racist political system, cut off all debates and ostracised those who dared to express dissent and opposition (him included), his lonely, brave voice gave us hope and strengthened us in our own opposition to the system. I respected the integrity with which he wrote and fought an often lonely battle against injustice – something he did throughout his life.

But I am writing this because of something else I read yesterday. I was reading a book by Anselm Grün on spirituality in which he writes about joy. He writes about the fact that our society knows so little joy and that we perpetuate and intensify our feelings of misery by our constant negative attitudes and pronouncements.

I kept on reflecting on what he writes – especially because joy is so vital. Joy in life is not just an emotion that makes our existence a pleasure or provides us with good feelings. Joy is a key to survival. If we lose our joy in life, we often arrive at a point where we completely give up on life.

As a contrast to this miserable situation, Grün draws attention to the fact that the Bible is full of feasts which are celebrated with much joy. For this one only has to read the Psalms. The deeper life of which the Bible speaks, is a life of joy.

But, and this is the point, life, even in the Bible is not merely about joy. The best Biblical symbols of this is the slavery in Egypt, the wearisome journey through the desert to the promised land, the cross and the suffering of the first Christian witnesses.What is true of the Bible, is simply also true of life. We experience in our everyday existence wonderful moments of joy, but then, in a moment, it can be taken away from us by one negative word, a news article, an angry look, a word of criticism or a seemingly insignificant event – all of which can makes us sad and miserable. Life has its beautiful moments, but also its moments of sadness.

Life does not only consist of joy. And religion has nothing to do with a permanent state of joy. Life is also sad. There are the moments, also for those with faith, that one wakes up and does not want to face the day ahaed.

There are days when we have no courage, that we are lost in emotions of despair and fear. That we are angry, upset, violent. There are times that we get ill, fall in dept, worry about the future – all of which make us sad. There is no one who can escape this darker side of human existence. Even the most happy people, know their moments of sadness.

The difference between the Bible with its happy and sad moments on the one hand and contemporary society with its misery is that some become victims of their sadness. When they look at life, sadness dominates and overshadows all moments of light – to the extent that the good no longer exists for them. Others understand that life is much more than sadness. Why should one let the darker moments overshadow the moments of fulfillment, of joy, of meaning? Why should one be conquered by fears and unhappiness? Life is ultimately about much more. It becomes a matter of perspective: does one look at sadness as the end of happiness or does one look as sadness which happens, but which is ultimately overshadowed by happiness.

One can become so obsessed with darkness and depression, that one succumbs to them and are destroyed by them. It becomes a spiral movement in which one is constantly drawn deeper and deeper. In Biblical times believers somehow managed in their darkest moments to hold on to the light, the deeper things that really matters. In jail, engulfed by darkness, Paul sang songs of joy at midnight. The secret was that they sang hymns “to God” (Ac.16:25). They were aware of the divine presence in their midst – something which transformed their situation.

It was the same Paul who advised his readers to be joyful. But he knew he had to add, quite tellingly, that they need to rejoice “in the Lord” (Phil4:4). And, finally, he also added, that they should rejoice “always.” It was a challenge to them – he knew such joy has to be sought. It does not fall from the sky.

The Bible as Word of God

We speak of the Bible as the “Word of God.” We think of the “Word of God” often as a "book" with pages which we read and study. And we see ourselves as believers who are people of the Book. This “bookishness” of our faith, sometimes tend to make us think that we are not as privileged as the disciples of Jesus. They had Jesus, they could listen to Him, hear Him ad follow Him. We, however, no longer are with Jesus. We “only” have words of Jesus.

But is is not that simple. Luke begins his first story in his Gospel with the wonderful narrative about two devoted Bible students: Zechariah and Elizabeth, the parents of John the Baptist, receive the announcement of his birth. They are described as observant of “all the Lord’s commandments and regulations blamelessly” (Luke 1:6). This is spirituality: they are transformed by their relationship with God. Their relationship with God is determined by God’s word, the law. The words of the Lord shape them, become a reality in their lives and remain the source of their ongoing devotion to God. They “only” have a Bible, but they live wholeheartedly from this Word of God.

Luke’s story about these two people therefore also includes God’s story in their lives. They know the divine words given to Moses. They are inspired by what Moses heard from God and what was later recorded as God’s will to Moses in the Old Testament as part of our Bible. The story about Moses is the heart of the story of Luke and of these people’s lives. In the history of Moses we have two stages: Moses experiences the divine word – and he becomes the messenger who brings this word to the people of God. He is a minister of the word.

But note that there is another “story” in this first narrative: The story of Moses is linked with the story of Gabriel. The angel brings God’s word to Zechariah and Elizabeth. He, Gabriel, tells them, “I stand in the presence of God and I have been sent to speak to you and tell you this good news.” They hear from the angel the Word of God, the Gospel, the Good News. Gabriel heart God’s Word and communicates it to them. Like Moses who received the Word from God, Gabriel also becomes a witness to the Word.

Thus begins the gospel of Jesus- with the Word of God to these two people. It is a powerful word. It transforms them, changes them and they become messengers of the Good News. Long before the birth of Jesus, the Gospel is heard!

We do not “read” a Bible or “merely” study a “book.” We, like the believers in the time of Jesus and like Jesus himself, have the Word of God which changes and transforms people’s livers in an irreversible manner. The Bible as Word of God contains many smaller “Words of God.” Jesus too lives from the Word of God. He preaches from the Word, for example, in the synagogue (Luke 4) and in the Sermon on the Mount. He heard the Word of God, for example, when he was baptized. And he became the Messenger, the one who witnessed to the Word of God and who embodied the Gospel of Good News.

Now Jesus has left, but we still live from God’s word – like people of all times. We have more than a Book. We are not less privileged than people in the time of Jesus. We also can live from God’s Word which inspires us to become messengers.

No wonder Luke adds a prologue to his gospel in which he talks about the words of Jesus which he wrote down. His book is meant to write the words of Jesus in the most reliable manner (Luke 1:1-4). He knew how vital God’s Word was. It was the Word from which Jesus lived – as he testified to Satan during the temptation, which set the hearts of the Emmaus disciples aflame, which made them witness even though Jesus disappeared from their sight and it was the Word which brought the Ethiopian to be baptized and which filled his life with joy.

In complete amazement:. The presence of God in our lives.

We can talk, pray, meditate and listen to God without experiencing God.

Acts begins quite soberly with a last discussion between Jesus and his disciples in which He tells them what will happen after his ascension (Ac.1:1-10). Jesus promises them the Holy Spirit who will empower them to become witnesses (Ac.1:8-9). They then return to Jerusalem, as Jesus asked them (Ac.1:4), where they pray and elect a successor for Judas (Ac.1:12-26). There is a lot of talking, reflection, meditating and praying going on in this introductory passage. They are busy, these disciples,as they respond to the message of Jesus and awaits what will happen.

And yet, there are also indications of something extraordinary in this passage. It focusses strongly on the Holy Spirit as the promise from the Father (Ac.1:4; but esp. 1:33) who would empower them to become witnesses. Characteristic of spirituality the passage focusses therefore on God’s relationship with humanity through the gift of the Spirit who will transform the disciples. Whilst there are references to God’s initiative and actions to deepen the divine relationship with humanity, the disciples from their side also respond to the divine actions by their prayers and the election of someone to succeed Judas. These are all precursors to the acts of empowerment which are to follow and which would bring humanity to do extraordinary things. The resurrection is not enough. That was just the beginning. Now follows the process of transformation. But the moment of empowerment is prepared by their accepting attitude to what Jesus wants from them – to return to Jerusalem – and their prayers. At the same time they also quite practically prepare for the gift of empowerment by appointing a successor to Judas. In this way not only God, but the disciples also are actively at work to nurture and intensify their mutual relationship. It is indeed a process of growth in a relationship: intense discussions as a group with Jesus, careful consideration of what He wants from them, prayerful response and preparation for what is to follow and practical arrangements for the future.

All these things illustrate various aspects of the growing relationship of God with humanity and the loving response of humanity to the divine actions in their lives. It has to do with divine gifts, support – but also about farewell, about new forms of relationship. At the same time there is devotion, obedience, retreat, discernment of God’s will and trust on the divine guidance. The relationship between God and humanity takes on many forms and varies constantly. It is indeed a journey in which this relationship develops in various forms and ways.

But there is something unique to this first phase of Acts in that everything comes to completion on the day of Pentecost. Everything is directed to and is preparation for this event: it is the day on which the divine promises become a reality and the Spirit touches and changes people forever. What was expected previously, is experienced on this day. Here a divine fire burns in people. They are inspired by a Spirit of love in the service of God. Perhaps even because they awaited it so intensely, their experience is so intense.... It is the great moment of transformation.

It is easy to reduce Pentecost to a moment that people are being empowered and transformed. They become fearless witnesses, we say. But Pentecost is about much more than this. People are changed, but they become people who worship God in amazement as the God of power who is present in their lives. It is not what they would do on that day, which makes most sense. It is what God did and what God is doing and God’s fulfilling presence which is what everything is all about.

This is clear in the simple description of the Pentecost events. A heavenly sound “from heaven” fills the house and fire tongues descends on each one of them. Heaven descends to earth. And then, according to Acts 2:11, they proclaim the mighty deeds of God. It is the divine presence and deeds which fill their hearts and make them break out in spontaneous witness. Pentecost is for Luke the coming of the Lord (Ac.2:20). It is the day of the Lord’s coming in power and glory. God is present among us through the Holy Spirit.

Pentecost is a powerful reminder that God desires a relationship with us which is intimate: ultimately God is with us as God who is stronger than death. We must remember and meditate on this constantly. From the very beginning God was with us as the fire of love who renews us.

We can speak, think, meditate and even pray without really experiencing the presence of God. Pentecost reminds us that ultimately we have to experience our faith as contemplation – as the refreshing, powerful experience of the divine presence. On this day our prayerful waiting is over – what we expected, is finally a reality. Our longing for God is transformed into our joy in the divine presence. Finally, finally we experience the God of fire and of love....

What is Spirituality? On walking pass a treasure

On the plane from Windhoek I read this joke:

Two professors in economics walk down the street and see a R200 banknote on the pavement. As they walk pass the note, the first one comments:

"Look someone dropped a R200 note. What a careless and stupid thing to do," said professor A.

A few meters further the other one suddenly says:

"It cannot be genuine,"otherwise someone else would have picked it up."

A wonderful little story which could be used to explain Spirituality...... One sees the special treasure and walks past it....

When 83 000 rugby fanatics fall silent.... En joying the game.

The rugby test against the Irish on Saturday was attended, if I remember correctly, by 83 000 people. What a massive number of people. They gather in an impressive stadium and sing loudly and enthusiastically. The sound overwhelms and touches one deeply.

But it is also a crowd that knows its rugby and notices the smallest detail. When Petersen seemed to have tackled his opponent with a high tackle, the crowd is deeply upset and the boo’s rain over the poor man. This is not how one plays the game, young man....

But then there were the penalties. Each time, whether the Irish or the Boks were kicking, a deadly silence broke out on the field. One “hears,” says the commentator, the silence.

Beautiful.

But also remarkbale – to hear 83 000 people fall into silence so that one can hear a needle drop. And that for a kick.

And, the commentator added, he wished that the people back home in South Africa can also remain so silent with penalities. It is, therefore, unusual – this silence of the Irish crowd.

I also noted the silence. And I reflected about the culture which creates such an attitude of sportmanship. Here, I think, rugby really reigns supreme. It is enjoyed with a sportmanship, but it is also appreciated for its beauty and for its power. The kickers – of both the home team and the visitors – are given a fair chance to entertain, to show what they can do, to bring out the best of their ability.

It is a mature attitude. Sport gives so much more joy when one can experience the best and when the players can perform optimally. The silence allows and gives them space to show the crowds what they can do.

The only thing that impresses more than the silence is the culture behind that silence.

This culture of enjoying, of appreciating sport extends to other aspects of the game. After everything is over the Irish line up to shake the hands of the Boks.

Beautiful.

Is there somewhere some link with the fact that the Irish are traditionally so strongly Catholic? I have to think about this.

Hearing the silence, I realize why sport - even in its minutest of detail - reveals why it has such a great influence on people.

That silence. Of 83 000 people – and that for a kick.

Instruments of power. On our partnership with God.

The story of the Ethiopian official in Acts 8 focusses to a large extent on the interpretation of Scripture. There is in the passage a lot of discussion about Isaiah 53:7-8 (which is quoted in Acts 8:32-33). This focus should not let us underestimate the request of the Ethipian to be baptized (Ac.8:38-39). For Luke baptism was particularly important. In the Lukan context it represents an extraordinary event. At the beginning of the Gospel of Luke, Jesus was baptised, representing his inauguration as the royal Messiah (Lk.321-22). It represents the beginning of his ministry, God’s call to him to redeem and empower humanity. Acts 2 begins with the baptism of the believers with the Holy Spirit and the baptism of all believers (Ac.2:38). It is also the event which inaugurates the proclamation of the Gospel through the world. And, in Samaria the believers were baptized, whereafter they received the Holy Spirit (Ac.8:16). Baptism therefore signifies that amazing transformation of believers from bondage to children of God who live powerfully. The baptism in Acts 8 must be understood in this sense. It is in fact the result of the reading of Scripture: it illustrates how powerfully Scripture changes people and establishes a life-generating relationship with God in Christ.

The baptism of the Ethiopian follows after the brief remark of Philip that Scripture spoke of Jesus (Ac.8:35). He then expresses his desire to be baptized (cf. Ac.2:38). Baptism represents two matters: on the one hand one dies by being immersed in the water. One leaves the old, sinful existence behind. The coming up out of the water represents the new life into which one is born. Paul explained it as follows in Romans 6:4: “We were therefore buried with him through baptism into death in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life.” It is a paradox: baptism represents death and life. We die to ourselves. But it also represents newness, power and glory. We are miraculously given a new existence. This is what happened to the Ethiopian. In Christ he is no longer a seeker. He has been united with Christ and has, therefore, been given a new existence. It is a paradox – we need to die in order to live. We need to be liberated from the old order of existence to enter an existence in which we experience joy.


There is, however, another paradox which is closely connected with the Ethipian’s mystical union with Christ in his baptism. In the story of the Emmaus disciples we have a remarkable observation: The two disciples recognize Jesus when he breaks bread with Him. Their eyes were opened (Luke 24:31) after they were kept from recognizing Him (Luke 24:16). But then follows: “he disappeared from their sight.” In the story of the Ethiopian, he is baptized and “the Spirit of the Lord suddenly took Philip away, and the eunuch did not see him again” (Ac.8:39). Philip, who witnessed to the Ethiopian and baptized him, is no longer with him. He is now on his own. What Jesus did to his disciples, happens in the case of Philip, the guide to the new life, with his new disciple. In both stories the main character appears and disappears. The main character is recognized, but is then no longer seen. One can recognize Jesus and then no longer see Him – just as one can see Jesus without recognizing Him.

But note what power is let loose in the life of the Emmaus disciples. They, who were somber and desperate, now become, after Jesus disappearance, powerful witnesses of his resurrection. And the Ethiopian: he who had no one to show him the way (Ac.8:31) and pleaded with Philip to help him (Ac.8:34), went on his way rejoicing (Ac.8:39). He no longer had Philip with him to guide him. The absence of Philip was replaced by the joy of being united with Christ. His life was transformed. His heart was filled with flaming joy – just like the hearts of the two Emmaus disciples were burning and just like their inordinate haste to report their miraculous encounter after Jesus disappeared.

Why is this so remarkable? It is so remarkable because it speaks of the way in which God transforms us from weakness to become partners. Jesus has to go away so that we can live in power.

This empowerment takes place on three levels.

There is, first of all, God’s acts of liberation and empowerment in Jesus. We can live differently, powerfully because of what Jesus once did. God worked powerfully in Jesus to restore to humanity freedom and to give to humanity a life of fulfillment. Without this anchor, our ship will never be secure.

And then, secondly, God co-opts humanity in this process of empowerment. Jesus leaves, goes his way, so to speak. But he also transforms people, his weak, somber and hopeless followers, into witnesses who are instruments of the divine power. His witnesses spread the divine word. They do wonderful, powerful and mighty deeds (Philip; Ac.8:6). God co-opts and shares the task of witnessing.

But this is not the end of the story. The first witnesses do not keep the power to themselves. The witness about the divine Word is spread and the powerful transformation of humanity is, thirdly, continued far beyond the first witnesses. Power is shared, later generations are included and empowered. The Gospel reaches out through the centuries to many generations. What happened to the disciples of Jesus after the resurrection, as it is told in the story of the Emmaus disciples, now happens in the lives of his disciples. They become witnesses of God’s faithfulness and love in Christ. And then, the trust and love of God remains, though one generation of witnesses after the other may disappear from the scene. The witness of Jesus liberated and empowered the Emmaus disciples. The witness of Philip liberated and empowered the Ethiopian. Luke now tells the story of the Ethiopian to inform his readers that God’s mighty deeds are continued from generation to generation to generation. Luke witnesses to his readers about these events so that they can become involved and be empowered. And we read Luke’s story so that it can become our story and empower us. Jesus’ farewell, his disappearance, Luke wants to say, does not mean the end of empowerment. We can actually still experience the divine power. Here we need to remember: our power is not to be found in ourselves. It is to be found in th story which we tell – a story of liberation and empowerment. Because of what we speak and what we live, we become a powerful presence in this world. God is now speaking the divine word through our life and words. The words of God are spoken through us by the Holy Spirit. It is a powerful word. It is a word that brings great joy – we are in a relationship with God which heals God’s world, brings freedom to humanity and empowers humanity to great things.

It is a mystery: in the absence of Jesus lies our power! In telling the story of Jesus, we find power.

It is remarkable to consider how God makes us partners in witnessing liberation and power to our world. We can truly speak words of liberation, words of power. We can.

Long before we longed for God, God longingly reached out to us (Acts 8).

When one reads the story of the Ethiopian in Acts 8, one is struck by his piety. He worshipped God in Jerusalem. He studies the Bible on his way back. Together with Philip he engages in a close reading of the text. He desires to know what the prophet wanted to say. These are all indications of someone who is seeking the deeper things in life. He desires the godly life.

And he is not disappointed. At a certain stage something decisively happens to him and changes his life dramatically. It is the moment of recognition, the revelation of the mystery. At this moment he is transformed, he is baptized by Philip.

One could say that God therefore “responds” to his piety. God recognizes his desire and intense longing for the deeper things. It is this which makes us think that there is a certain pattern in our religion. We thus think that lectio ( the reading of Scripture in verse 28) and the meditatio (the close reading and study of the Bible in verses 32-35) lead to the prayerful response of the Ethiopian and then to his baptism (i.e. to oratio and contemplatio). It is similar to what happened in the case of the Emmaus disciples. They read and meditated on the Bible with Jesus, and all the time, as they say later on, their hearts were burning in them. They felt the desire as they reflected on Scripture. One could argue that the study of the Bible kindles flames of longing for God.

To some extent this is true. When we listen to God and when we meditate on God’s word, we experience a desire for God. And God will fulfill our yearning for divine intervention and fulfillment.

But it would be a mistake to think that God only reaches out when we are good Bible students and when we desire and long for God. It is most remarkable what is being emphasized in the story of the Ethiopian in Acts 8: before we read about the Ethiopian studying the Bible on his chariot and long before God touched him through Scripture and Philip’s witness (verses 27-28), Luke tells, an angel of the Lord told Philip to travel the lonely road to Gasa (verse 26). God’s initiative sets the wheels in motion, so to speak. Right from the beginning, in Luke’s mind, God is steering events. It is the deeds of God which let things happen – like on Pentecost day. And througout the narrative we see the holy presence of the Spirit. Philip obeys the divine command and sets off on his journey. And then again he is told by divine intervention to go to the chariot and to stay there (verse 29). And, finally, after the baptism, God again intervenes and the Spirit takes Philip away (39).

All the human responses to Scripture, all the discussions and events, fit into the framework of the divine initiative. God is on the way to us while we are travelling the lonely road, through the desert (verse 26). As we witness and as we search, we always discover that we are responding to a divine intervention in our lives. It is not our piety which brings us to God. The transformation is a result of God’s initiative and intervention, however closely it is linked with our human activities. We long and desire for God and God touches and fills our heart so that we find fulfillment. But long before this happens, long before our desires are awakened, God desired to be with us and reached out to us.

God responds to our desire and longing for the divine presence. But God does not respond because we desire and long for God. Long before we experience our desire and longing, God has reached out to us. This is all about grace. And this is why Spirituality is about God’s relationship with us (and not the other way round).

The Desire for God's word. On the difference between spiritual hermeneutics and traditional readings of the Bible.

We can never exhaust the meaning of Scripture - the mere fact of milions of sermons illustrates the inexhaustible nature of these texts. They generate meaning over centuries and all over the world. Scripture speaks to us in ever new ways. It mysteries are revealed to us time and again.

Spiritual hermeneutics or the spiritual reading of the Bible share with traditional readings of the Bible the conviction that we have to reflect carefully on Biblical texts in order to understand its meaning for our time and world. In Spiritual hermeneutics this attempt is called "meditatio" or the careful reflection on the text.

But, while traditional Bible reading speaks of "studying" the Bible, spiritual hermeneutics would rather speak of a dialogue with the God's word. God speaks to us in the human witnesses and we enter in a dialogue with them in order to fathom the mystery of the text.

The spiritual reading is not about understanding the "text." It is about a personal relationship. It is not merely a matter of studying letters and phrases and sentences. One is rather listening to Someone, to someone who is communicating with us through a text. It is about much more than understanding a text or its contents. We do not possess a text, we do not determine the meaning of a text. An author speaks with us and gives us clues to unravel the mysteries.

Look at the story of the Ethiopian in Acts 8 again. He is a believer who travels all the way to Jerusalem to pray in the temple. As a believer he then, on his way back, studies the Bible. He clearly desires to know more about his faith.

Luke emphasizes that he read the "prophet" Isaiah. He is not busy determining the contents of a book or a text. He asks in verse 34: "who is the prophet talking about - himself or someone else?" He is trying to understand the prophet.

From this dialogue with the prophet emerges a transformational experience. He takes the initiative and asks to be baptised. His faith is transfomed. What he read, changed his life forever. It is much more than understanding better. His reading set his heart aflame, like Scripture did to the Emmaus disciples (cf a previous blog). He desires to be baptized.

A spiritual reading of the Bible asssumes a relationship of faith with the One who is speaking in it. It is not the reading, but what happens through the reading which is important. The reading transforms, it reveals the mystery of God which creates new life.

The relational aspect is decisive because of what it implies. It is a risk to listen to God's word. It is not something which one can "understand" and which then leaves one unaffected. The Word of God can take one where one never thought one would end up. When God speaks, it can touch our lives in an awesome manner. That is why a spiritual reading assumes and promotes awe in the presence of God's mystery. Where God speaks, one stands in awe. Understanding is important, but it is only one dimension of the process of reading the Bible. More is at stake: what counts is also the "spirit" with which one reads the Bible. And how many ways are there in which we are reading the Bible: we read it "neutrally," "objectively," even patronizingly ("it is now so much more difficult to believe than in more primitive times....", etc).

A spiritual reading understands that the Holy Spirit who represents God's awesome, powerful presence in our midst, is at work the very moment we read the Bible. The Ethiopian had all sorts of questions. But ultimately he desired to be baptized, to be ingrained in the life according to the Spirit. Out of his reading of Scripture, his faith, came a transformative moment, a powerful conversion, which changed his life. No wonder he continued his journey with great joy (verse 39).

A spiritual reading reflects the desire to know more - more than mere knowledge. It reflects the desire to encounter the divine, transformative mystery. It is about transformation, about growing deeper in one's faith, about a closer relationship with God who speaks to us. And it reflects the conviction that the Bible plays a seminal role in this transformation and growth.

Traditionally we study the Bible to know more, to understand better. A spiritual reading would want to respond to this by saying it is not the understanding of the content of the Bible which is so important. What really counts is the difference this understanding makes in one's life and faith. That is why a spiritual reading is deeply linked with the desire to be with a powerful God.

The spiritual reading of the Bible and the established readings of Scripture. On the special nature of spiritual hermeneutics.

The question is often asked whether a spiritual reading of the Bible is really different from our established reading of Scripture. And especially theologians and pastors who are trained to read the Bible responsibly, want to know why their theological training is being reconsidered in Biblical Spirituality and Spiritual Hermeneutics. What is the diference, if there is one at all, between their theologically informed and exegetically refined reading of the Bible and a spiritual reading?

There are more than one way to explain the difference(s). But a key difference will be pointed out by reflecting in some depth on what our traditional readings of the Bible really are. In modern preaching, teaching and in theological and Biblical training, it is underlined that one should “understand” the text. The “contents” and “meaning” are paramount objectives of reading the Bible. And time and again there is a reference to the famous expression of Philip to the Ethiopian: “Do you understand what you are reading?” (Ac. 8:30). So “understanding” and “comprehension” of Bibilcal contents becomes first prize.

It will make much sense to investigate the fascinating story of the encounter between Philip (the relatively unknown apostle who plays such a decisive role in Acts 8) and the Ethiopian. It will help us to understand the special nature of a spiritual reading – or spiritual hemeneutics. It is even more illuminating when one compares this narrative with the Emmaus story in Luke 24 (cf some previous blogs). Both provide special insight in spiritual hermeneutics, but they also share some salient features.

According to Luke 24:27 Jesus explained Scripture and its relationship with Jesus in detail to the two disciples from Emmaus. The same focus on Scripture appears in Acts. The important man, the Ethiopian, sits on his chariot and reads aloud (Ac.8:30) from the prophet Isaiah. This then, is “lectio,” the first step in spiritual hermeneutics. It refers to an involved reading of the text. By reading the text in this way, it resonates with the reader – something that is, for example, prominent in Benedictine spirituality. Here, however, Luke 24:27 underlines also what the Ethiopian is reading.Luke explicitly quotes the passage from Isaiah (verses 32-33). The readers of Luke’s book become co-readers. They, like the Ethiopian, are also “reading” the text. Luke makes sure that they remain involved. Lectio appears in the text, but the text also promotes lectio. Lectio repeated!

But reading is not enough. Philip knows this. This is why he asks: Do you understand what you are reading? (verse 30 – though the Greek does not really use the word “understand”). And the Ehtiopian also knows this is important. He responds: “How can I unless someone ‘explains’ it to me”? The counterquestion underlines the need for explanation. I am quoting the NIV here. It is interesting that the word “explain” is used in this translation – which shows the pre-understanding of the translators of the book and which reflects the cerebral nature of our Bible reading. The Greek says something quite different, which, as we shall see, is decisive for spiritual hermeneutics. The Ethiopian actually said: “How can I if no one shows me the way?” (Later more on this). The Ethiopian knows lectio is not enough. He is reading and reading on his desert journey, but the way is unclear. And he is quick to begin to share his questions on the passage he is reading: “Is the prophet talking about himself or someone else?” (verse 34).


Lectio is important. This man on his lonely journey is on his way back from Jerusalem where he worshipped (verse 27). This is an important word in Luke and indicates dedication and commitment to faith. He worships, even if he does not understand fully. In this sense he is different than the two Emmaus-disciples, who, though close to Jesus, are somber and without hope. Hy keeps on reading and reading.They gave up Jerusalem - he had been worshipping there. But he also has his critical questions – illustrating that lectio is not enough. He wants to know the way. He reflected on what he read. With this a second dimension of spiritual reading is mooted: In his meditation he asks critical questions. Wat is happening in the text? About what or whom is the author speaking? What is meant? (More about this later).

It seems as if the Bible is read here in the same way as we are doing today when we study it with commentaries and with the help of experts. It is being read carefully and by asking critical questions. And, for sure, in this sense there is an overlap between spiritual hermeneutics and critical scholarship or modern Bible reading.

And yet, there is a difference between a critical reading and a spiritual reading, as we shall see. Here it can be noted very briefly that the difference has to dow ith the role of “understanding.” Understanding is important. But is is one dimension of spiritual hermeneutics. It follows after lectio – and this is already an indication that meditatio follows a first important step: one can worship God and still read the Bible with involvement – even if understanding is not immediately present. Though understanding is a condition – and an important one – it is not a pre-condition. Spiritual hermeneutics accounts for this. But more on this later.

Biblical Studies, the big names allege, focus on interpretation and on understanding. Spiritual hermeneutics will want to say: the focus is on spirituality, on faith experienced. That is rather different.

Velasquez: Emmaus

Here is another painting of the Emmaus story - this time by Velasquez. It hangs in the Metropolitan Museum of Modern Art. I am presently doing some reading on this and other paintings on Emmaus. It is fascinating reading and I hope to write more about it later here.

Shocked. Rembrandt's early painting of the Emmaus story in Luke 24

In 1628 Rembrandt painted this version of the Emmaus narrative in Luke 24. Again he focusses on the table scene, but this time the portrait is as dramatic as the other one was quiet and intimate (cf. yesterday's blog). The disciple experiences with a shock who his companion at the table really is.

This is something to reflect on. I am busy tracing paintings on the Emmaus narrative. It is a fascinating search. More later.

Rembrandt and the Emmaus disciples

Rembrandt painted more than one version of the two disciples of Emmaus. This one, from 1648 (in the Louvre), focusses on Christ and the two disciples at the table. The figure of Christ is surrounded by and bathed in light, but the light also falls on the table, the place where the meal was served. And Christ is blessing the bread....

Desire and the presence of God

I remember the first time I saw Chagall’s stained-glass windows in the cathedral in Zürich, Switzerland. They were breathtakingly beautiful. I was moved in a simple, very ordinary manner by what I saw: the yellow, green, blue colours. The flowing forms. The Biblical motifs. All coming together in a special moment in which one feels a special desire to be with God, the One who is Beauty, who is Holiness. I experienced a desire to pray. I felt the need to dwell, to remain in this space. Even though my words and thoughts were completely inadequate to express the desire I felt, I knew that what I saw was preliminary, material, concrete – and yet I experienced immortality and Spirit and desired to have more.

Gradually I began to realize that my response with its desire to be with God was because of what God was doing to me. God was touching me. It was as if my eyes were directed to the windows, as if the windows said to me: “Look here!” Yellow, green and blue colours caught and held my eye. The flowing forms took me and lifted my heart skywards. God spoke to me in the Biblical motifs. Ultimately, it was not really about me looking at the windows. God was entering my life in this way and my desire was awakened because of the divine presence. Responding to the divine touch, I desired to know more, understand more, find words to speak about this, to fathom the Mystery of what is happening to me.

It is like a moth drawn to the Light – as if one wants to lose oneself in what is pure Light. It is looking in a mirror and seeing a mystery – and desiring the one day when one will see clearly, from countenance to countenance. It is ultimately all about the divine Presence.

On the presence of God in our lives. Contemplation in Luke 24.

The two books of Luke – the Gospel and Acts – are very concrete stories about Jesus and the apostles. But they are hugely symbolic. Both speak of the great journey – of the gospel of the earthly Jesus, and of the journey of the good news about the exalted Jesus in the lives of the apostles. In this greater journey there is the smaller journey of these two disciples on their way to Emmaus. They travel somberly, without hope. Theirs is not a triumphant journey.

I can imagine how they must have felt as they walked the lonely road to Emmaus.

And yet, they were not alone. While they were on the road, Jesus followed them. This smaller journey of the two disciples which frames their story in Luke 24, reveals, for me, the deepest dimension of the narrative. On the one hand there is the serious discussion between the two: they even question each other on the events that took place among them (verse15). It is journey which does not take place in silence. It is not a journey of people who are on their way to a funeral – silent and speechless. Theirs is a journey full of questions, talking, speaking – expressing their deep, inner feeling. According to verse 15 they questioned each other.

Luke wants to portray them as two people who were yearning for answers, struggling to find closure. They were talking about their deepest desires.

And, then, Jesus joins them. Later on, they would recognize him (verse 31). But the answer came to them much earlier. The story begins on a high note right at its beginning in verse 15 with the appearance of Jesus among them. The dramatic reversal sets in the moment Jesus approached them and walked with them.

One of the most pregnant moment of the mystical experience is the mystical antiphrasis: we yearn for God, we earnestly seek answers by praying to God. Already in our yearning, God is present.

Luke says that Jesus came to them and walked right into their discussion: “what are you talking about?” He is there, the one about whose absence they were talking so somberly and intensely. He follows them and immediately becomes a presence as they express their deepest feelings.

We can talk much about the absence of God. We think our journey is lonely and that we have been abandoned. And all the tims, Jesus saw us leaving, he heard us crying and he followed us. He was there – we just did not recognize Him.....

How sad that we do not recognize how our deepest yearning for God is already an indication of God’s presence in our lives.

Oratio: responding prayerfully to the touch of God. The Emmaus disciples 4.

I am still intrigued by new dimensions which I see in the story about the two disciples of Emmaus in Luke 24. Luke often associates deep symbolic meaning with his concrete narrative. He does so especially when he speaks of the actions of the two disciples of Emmaus after Jesus explained Scripture to them.

When they arrive in Emmaus, Jesus acted if he were going farther. But they urged him strongly: Stay with us, for it is nearly evening: the day is almost over” (verse 29).

This verse is related to what is said about the two disciples in verse 32. There they explain how their hearts were burning in them while Jesus talked with tehm on the road and opened the Scriptures to them. They had a special experience even though their hearts were slow to believe the prophets (verse 25). And yet, these slow hearts were burning hearts!

At their home in Emmaus, the two disciples invite Jesus into their homes. They “urge” him “strongly” to stay with them. The same word for urge is used in Acts 16:15 where Lidia, after her conversion, insists urgently that Paul stays over in her home. She “forced” them to stay there. The two disciples in Emmaus requests Jesus in a similar urgent manner to stay with them. Even though they do not recognize hims, even though they are foolish (verse 25), this is how they respond to what turned out to have been the divine touch on the road.

They respond with their burning hearts by inviting the One who spoke so powerfully, to remain with them.

This request was in reality yet another symbol of their prayer, of oratio. In our dark night, they are saying through this request, we want to be with You.

Something mystical was happening to them – and it had them praying. With this a fundamental dimension of mysticism is spelled out. The mystical experience cannot take place without a prayer of desire and yearning. It is all about oratio.

The most complete mysticism... On Brother Lawrence, the French mystic

Evelyn Underhill’s book, “The mystics of the church” has a wonderful two-page section on Brother Lawrence, the 17th century French mystic. I have revisited her remarks about this man several times because they are so fascinating.

She describes him as “the best known and loved of the French mystics” who wrote the “simple” book, “Practice of the Presence of God.”

Father Lawrence does not reveal any of the stages and disciplines of the other mystics. His mysticsm is much more simple, sober, natural.

As an 18 year old, he experienced a conversion after which he simply decided to leave behind the world. He had no self-interest.

This conversion experience also filled him with the love of God. He had a period of four years in which he suffered much because of various reasons, but then he “passed to a perfect liberty and continual joy.”

As I read these remarks, I get the feeling to add: "Just like that!" He simply became like that, as if it was the most natural thing in the world to do.

Brother Lawrence simple mysticism was accompanied by an even simpler lifestyle. He joined a monastery where he did hard, manual work.

And, to crown all, the manual work which he disliked so much, never kept him from contemplating God.

Underhill writes. “Such freedom and suppleness of soul – a characteristic on which Francois de Sales and Lawrence lay equal stress – means in practice a level of spirituality which is less startling, but far more complete, than the entranced contemplations of the ecstatic withdrawn from active affairs.”

Lawrence wrote how he once went to buy wine for the convent where he worked as handyman and how he said to God that it was God’s business the was about to do. Shooping for wine as God's business... And after he bought the wine, he was proud of how well he did it....

This, Underhill writes, witness to a real transfiguration of human personality, completely transfused by the Divine power and love.

I keep on thinking about this transfiguration of one’s personality so that it is completely transfused by Divine power and love. It seems the right thing to do, the straightforward option: live in God's love - it is after all the most precious gift one can desire.

And, I wonder, why, then, do we not all do so? What keeps us from being always in this love?

I know people who are living completely and fully in God's love as if it is the most natural thing to do.

Underhill quotes a letter which Brother Lawrence wrote about himself in which he notes that he grew so accustomed to the Divine Presence that it succours him at all times. He is so filled with joy – so continually and sometimes so transcendent that he is forced to use means to moderate them and to prevent their appearing outwardly!

So, I wonder and marvel, one can become carried away by the divine love!

When, sometimes, he gets too busy with his manual work, he observes, God recalls him. He feels this and he promptly answers to those inward drawings. He would then say such phrases like, “My God, behold me, wholle Thine; Lord make me according to Thy heart.” And then it seems to him as if God, satisfied by these words, resposes again and rests in the depth and centre of his soul.



This is beautiful. Natural, sober mysticism of love. Complete new, fulfilled life in the divine love.

The Visio Dei: We can only know ourselves in the light of our experience of God

Calvin’s Institutes, which represent his theology and spirituality, begins with the way in which we experience our faith – which is really what spirituality is all about. He focusses on how we see ourselves and contrasts with this how we should regard ourselves. It is striking to see what significant role contemplation of God plays in Calvin’s institutes in this regard.

Calvin was critical about the way in which we overestimate our own importance, wisdom, righteousness, holiness and merit. In this hubris and self-pride, we lack true self-knowledge.

The only way we can arrive at a true understanding of ourselves is by contemplating the face of God. He therefore writes in the second paragraph of his opening chapter on our lack of self-knowledge which he says we need to overcome by looking at the Lord. Several times he underlines how important it is for us to experience God’s presence – only then will we be able to live faith. “We need,” he writes, “to raise our thoughts to God.”

This is how he formulates it (note how he repeatedly refers to the need to experience God - to have a visio Dei:

“2. On the other hand, it is evident that man never attains to a true self-knowledge until he has previously contemplated the face of God, and come down after such contemplation to look into himself. For (such is our innate pride) we always seem to ourselves just, and upright, and wise, and holy, until we are convinced, by clear evidence, of our injustice, vileness, folly, and impurity. Convinced, however, we are not, if we look to ourselves only, and not to the Lord also —He being the only standard by the application of which this conviction can be produced.... If, at mid-day, we either look down to the ground, or on the surrounding objects which lie open to our view, we think ourselves endued with a very strong and piercing eyesight; but when we look up to the sun, and gaze at it unveiled, the sight which did excellently well for the earth is instantly so dazzled and confounded by the refulgence, as to oblige us to confess that our acuteness in discerning terrestrial objects is mere dimness when applied to the sun. Thus too, it happens in estimating our spiritual qualities. So long as we do not look beyond the earth, we are quite pleased with our own righteousness, wisdom, and virtue; we address ourselves in the most flattering terms, and seem only less than demigods. But should we once begin to raise our thoughts to God, and reflect what kind of Being he is, and how absolute the perfection of that righteousness, and wisdom, and virtue, to which, as a standard, we are bound to be conformed, what formerly delighted us by its false show of righteousness will become polluted with the greatest iniquity; what strangely imposed upon us under the name of wisdom will disgust by its extreme folly; and what presented the appearance of virtuous energy will be condemned as the most miserable impotence. So far are those qualities in us, which seem most perfect, from corresponding to the divine purity.”

Spirituality and sin

Calvinism is often described as a heavy, somber tradition with much emphasis on sin. It is true that Calvin wrote much about sin. And it is also true that certain forms of Calvinism have a very somber character. And it is equally true that one can become unbalanced and even pathological about sin and its dark hold on one’s life.

But then one should understand Calvin’s comments on sin within his spirituality. It happens, for example, that one may “knows” about one's sin without challenging it. Often believers live with sin, accept it, rationalize it and even accommodate it in some way or other. We tend to play down the destructive role of sin in our lives.

It is in the nature of sin that it makes one “hard” or “insensitive” for that which separates us from God.

Against this relativizing of sin, Calvin stresses that one should not only have an awareness of sin, but one should also feel contrition and remorse. One can talk much about sin without being transformed from it. Spirituality reflects an awareness of one’s own lack of holiness and of one’s own sinfulness. From this perspective, one cannot reflect enough about sin.

Whilst one can have an unhealthy, even pathological fascination with sin, one can also fall in the trap not to understand how one's inner worth is being destroyed by forces of evil which one allows in your life.

The infinite sweetness of the divine goodness – the notion of God in Calvin's spirituality

In my reflection on Calvinist spirituality, it struck me how much Calvin emphasizes God’s power. In his Spirituality the aim of faith experience and of sanctification is to bring to God all the glory because of God's mighty deeds and works.

In my further reading on this I came across an article in the Brittanica in which it is said how Calvin did indeed speak about God's power, but that he, in addition, also carefully wanted to depict God as a loving father.

This contributed to the misunderstanding that Calvinism is one of the most patriarchal forms of Christianity. And yet, the article continues, Calvin wrote movingly about how we experience God as a mother, as “mild, kind, gentle, and compassionate.” He wanted to stress this side of God's character because he he was upset that some of his contemporaries overemphasized the fear of God. God must not be portrayed as a God who must be dreaded.

The article continues, “Human beings can never praise him properly, Calvin declared, ‘until he wins us by the sweetness of his goodness.’” Calvin’s understanding of Christianity is thus in many ways gentler than has been commonly supposed.

I follow this insight up with some further research,also checking Calvin's own pronouncements. And it strikes me how often he speaks about the sweetness of the divine goodness (e g in his commentary on John 11). In a work on Psalm 119 he also writes about the divine sweetness which brings us to love God. And it is this sweetness which also inspires us to sanctification.

I want to think more about this. As we stay close to the "sweet" word of God, the God of love and compassion, we are filled by this love. It flows over into us and nestles in our hearts. If we are found by this love, Calvin writes, we will be able to resist temptation.

It is true that we often chase things which we think will give us love and fulfillment. Only to discover that these earthly, fleshly desires leaves us cold, unfulfilled, unclean.

Calvinist spirituality

Calvinistic spirituality is the one form and tradition of spirituality which is not often discussed. In 2009 Calvinists celebrate the 500th birthday of Jean Calvin, the Genevan reformer who had such a huge influence in Switzerland, France, The Netherlands, Scotland, the U.S.A. and South Africa.

Calvinist spritiuality has many forms – a.o. Presbyterian, Reformed, Dutch Reformed and several others. And yet one can say that this spirituality displays certain common characteristics.

There is the conviction that God took the initiative in the divine-human relationship and that God played a decisive role in the salvation of humanity. God does not only begin, but also completes and realizes salvation. Even faith is ultimately a gift of grace from God.

The Latin phrase: “soli Deo gloria” therefor represents one of the fundamental convictions in Calvinism. To God alone belongs the glory and honour for the good that is happening in this world and in humanity.

Calvinism did not lapse into speculative theology. God is consistently seen as a God who reaches out in love to humanity. God desired salvation for humanity.

Closely linked with this is another feature of Calvinist spirituality, namely its awareness of human sinfulness. God plays such a decisive role because of the complete inability and corrupt nature of humanity. In some forms Calvinism would display a dark, somber attitude towards human potential. Salvation as God’s grace is given to humanity. Humanity is totally depraved. The sinfulness of humanity is experienced intensely. In Calvinist worhsip, for example, confession of sin is one of the first elements: one cannot but approach God with a sense of sinfulness and of one's transgressions.

But closely linked with this inner conviction of human sinfulness there is also the firm confession that through Christ alone salvation is granted to humanity. It is a key conviction that confession of sin should always be linked with the celebration of God's grace and forgiveness as they were expressed in the life and ministry of Jesus. Reconciliation takes place between God and humanity exclusively through Christ. Through faith in Christ the power of sin is broken and humanity is given a new status.

With that one is brought to Calvinist perspective on the Holy Spiritu. Those who have received forgiveness of sin, has to live a life of gratitude. Through the Holy Spirit humanity is empowered to serve God – not only in its personal life, but in all relationships.

It is this life of gratitude, the challenge to respond to God’s love and grace in Christ, which is a seminal aspect of Calvinist spirituality. What one believes, should be lived. There is no interiority without exteriority. Calvinism is about doing, making a difference, living faith.


These are a few introductory remarks. It will be worthwhile to develop some of them in more detail. In short then, like all forms of Spirituality, Calvinist spirituality speaks about the relationship of God with humanity. Typical is that the transformation that happens in this relationship is completely and totally God's work. Humanity can only respond in gratitude to the divine intervention and action - and even this response is a matter of grace. Finally, it is typical of Calvinist sprituality that it emphasizes that faith must be experienced, must be lived in a life of gratitude.And this life of gratitude must be lived in terms of the whole existence of humanity and creation.

When human experience and the divine word interact. On yearning for God.

Spirituality is about faith experienced. It can also be described as “lived” faith.

But the word experience may be misleading, because it could easily deceive people to think that Sprituality is about emotions or feelings. And this creates apprehension, because we know too well that feelings can be misleading – that what one feels at moments of ecstacy may disappear the next moment when one experiences dark and unhappy feelings.

Spirituality is not about emotional faith. It is about experienced faith which may include emotions. It is not about feelings, but about involvement, commitment, self-implication in which feelings may play a role.

Spirituality surely includes emotions, but the experience in spirituality is about much more than emotions. The two disciples in the Emmaus episode are involved with all their feelings in what overfalls them after the message about the empty grave. They are deeply immersed in their mutual conversation. In Luke 24:17 they respond to Jesus’ question abouth what they are discussing by standing still with somber faces. They then talk with Jesus – not about their feelings so much as about their experience. But indirectly we see also how they felt about Jesus. They recount the past moments they experienced with Jesus. It is a story which reveals how deeply committed they were to Jesus and how they experienced Him as a powerful messenger of God. “He was powerful in word and deed,” a “prophet.” They admired Him for his piety, his journey with God, his spirituality. They were impressed and astonished by all these things. They experienced Him as the hope for Israel’s salvation. He was for them the embodiment of all God’s promises to God’s people of all ages. Not only their feelings, but all of their experiences and encounters with Jesus fill their memory and their faith.

And then the disaster of the cross and the empty grave overfell them (verses 20 and 24) – with, the greatest setback: Jesus is nowhere in sight.

So they share their emotions, but also their wider experiences with Jesus. They speak about their hopes when they were with Jesus, but also about their disillusionment when He was no longer to be seen. All their experiences of their years with Jesus are shared with the stranger who walks the way with them. Jesus touched their hearts, formed their lives, shaped their expectations, inspired them with hope, but now their hearts, previously so committed to his cause, were broken, in pieces, shattered. They are without hope, shocked, but they also experience that they no longer know what to think. They had seen the Light, but now they are in darkness. They hoped, but now they are leaving all their aspirations and expectations behind to return to their previous, old existence. They have experienced for years the power of Jesus’ presence among them, now they travel without Him, with empty hearts, with only their empty words which they share with each other.

What an “experience – these ups and downs, these light and dark moments in the spiritual journey!” One does not wish this nightmare with the bitter end, their disillusionment, even to one’s enemies. It must have been cruel to them as intimate disciples of Jesus. After the intensity of the divine presence in the live and person of Jesus, there is this void, this loneliness. They are experiencing the valleys of despair after the mountain – moments of glory. This is their “experience.” They are not speaking vaguely about some events among them. They are speaking about what happened to them, how deeply they were aware of the divine acts and presence in their recent experiences. They share their spirituality with Jesus: how they experience their faith and how they are experiencing it, also in this desperate journey to Emmaus.

But, see the other side of this picture. The conversation is not only about their experiences. We see this already in their report about Jesus. They are involved in what they are saying about Jesus, but all the time they are still speaking about Jesus. They are meditating, speaking, reflecting about Jesus, holding on to their memory of Him. They remain focussed on Jesus. It is all about their experience, but then the experience of the divine Presence and involvement in their lives as something and Someone outside themselves. They are still, in this dark moment, looking at the divine intervention in their existence.

Here two poles intersect – the divine and the human pole. They are somber, sad and without hope. But they also have been changed by the divine touch, by something, Someone outside themselves. They are still reflecting on God, Jesus, intimacy, power, hope, life.

There is this polar tension between the divine and the human. This is, then, what spirituality is all about – about the polar tension in the relationship between God and humanity. What we experience and what God does are often in a painful conflict.

Jesus does not make it much easier for the two disciples in this tension. He gives no miraculous self-revelation to them. He does no miracles or does not reveal that He is the resurrected one.

He takes the long road and opens the Bible. Let us trace the footsteps of God through the history of salvation. Look back at the divine deeds of God throughout the ages. Reflect on the divine actions long before you were even aware of Jesus. Remember, always remember that this is your salvation – that you are part of God’s great, great deeds throughout all times, part of the community of saints whose collective wisdom speaks about the mystery of God’s powerful, though often inexplicable involvement in human existence. Always live close to this collective wisdom, this understanding of the divine revelation by the many saints of all times. By engaging with them as they speak of God, you will be receiving new life, you will be initiated into the deeper wisdom, entering in ever intenser manner the mystery of God’s relationship with humanity. This is how Jesus travels with them on their spiritual journey in the new dispensation after his resurrection. If you want your broken hearts to be healed, reach out to the witnesses who spoke previously out of their experience of God’s faithfulness and love. After all, it is not “my” will, but the Father’s will which needs to be done. Bitter. The Father’s will can so often transcend our understanding. But so does, thankfully, the divine peace as well – which comes to those who live according to the divine will.

Later, the two understood this better. Then they realized why this difficult road was the better one. As they listened and meditated with Jesus on God’s word, Scripture once again set ablaze a desire in their hearts: “were not our hearts burning in us when He talked to us and opened up Scripture?” Their experience of Jesus before the resurrection and now their experience of the witness of the ages brought about a new mystical experience in them: fire burned in them. They desire for God was rekindled. They were empowered to pray, to reach out to God who has been talking to them in Scripture.

This is, then, what happens when Scripture as the witness of wisdom meets our experiences. What we have encountered in so many of our experiences, gets tested and challenged by what we read in Scriptures, in the words of wisdom, in the words of life. We reflect about who we are and what is happening to us in the light of the wisdom of all ages. And then, often, we begin to see how God really acts. And we begin to realize with awe how differently God often acts – against all expectations, even against our own will. We understand that our despair is the result of our own shortsightedness and our own servility to our will. And, as the flame of desire burns in us, we realize that our salvation is not to be found in our experiences, or in what we want, but in the divine Love who enters our experiences and opens our eyes for the new life which God gives, for the different, compassionate and unusual new ways in which God often acts. Without this light of Scripture, without the wisdom of the saints of all times, we will not survive.

Our faith is irrevocable and intricately linked to the powerful words of wisdom which God has given us as the light on our spirituality journey. Through them we are empowerd, we are given new hope, our desire for the divine Presence is rekindled. When we have come to the end of the road, in a mysterious way, God touches our innermost being and brings us to pray.

When human experience and the divine word interact. On yearning for God.

Spirituality is about faith experienced. It can also be described as “lived” faith.

But the word experience may be misleading, because it could easily deceive people to think that Sprituality is about emotions or feelings. And this creates apprehension, because we know too well that feelings can be misleading – that what one feels at moments of ecstacy may disappear the next moment when one experiences dark and unhappy feelings.

Spirituality is not about emotional faith. It is about experienced faith. It is not about feelings, but about involvement, commitment, self-implication.

Spirituality surely includes emotions, but the experience in spirituality is about much more than emotions. The two disciples in the Emmaus episode are involved with all their feelings in what overfalls them after the message about the empty grave. They are deeply immersed in their mutual conversation. In Luke 24:17 they respond to Jesus’ question abouth what they are discussing by standing still with somber faces. They then talk with Jesus – not about their feelings so much as about their experience. But indirectly we see also how they felt about Jesus. They recount the past moments they experienced with Jesus. It is a story which reveals how deeply committed they were to Jesus and how they experienced Him as a powerful messenger of God. “He was powerful in word and deed,” a “prophet.” They admired Him for his piety, his journey with God, his spirituality. They were impressed and astonished by all these things. They experienced Him as the hope for Israel’s salvation. He was for them the embodiment of all God’s promises to God’s people of all ages. Not only their feelings, but all of their experiences and encounters with Jesus fill their memory and their faith.

And then the disaster of the cross and the empty grave overfell them (verses 20 and 24) – with, the greatest setback: Jesus is nowhere in sight.

So they share their emotions, but also their wider experiences with Jesus. They speak about their hopes when they were with Jesus, but also about their disillusionment when He was no longer to be seen. All their experiences of their years with Jesus are shared with the stranger who walks the way with them. Jesus touched their hearts, formed their lives, shaped their expectations, inspired them with hope, but now their hearts, previously so committed to his cause, were broken, in pieces, shattered. They are without hope, shocked, but they also experience that they no longer know what to think. They had seen the Light, but now they are in darkness. They hoped, but now they are leaving all their aspirations and expectations behind to return to their previous, old existence. They have experienced for years the power of Jesus’ presence among them, now they travel without Him, with empty hearts, with only their empty words which they share with each other.

What an “experience – these ups and downs, these light and dark moments in the spiritual journey!” One does not wish this nightmare with the bitter end, their disillusionment, even to one’s enemies. It must have been cruel to them as intimate disciples of Jesus. After the intensity of the divine presence in the live and person of Jesus, there is this void, this loneliness. They are experiencing the valleys of despair after the mountain – moments of glory. This is their “experience.” They are not speaking vaguely about some events among them. They are speaking about what happened to them, how deeply they were aware of the divine acts and presence in their recent experiences. They share their spirituality with Jesus: how they experience their faith and how they are experiencing it, also in this desperate journey to Emmaus.

But, see the other side of this picture. The conversation is not only about their experiences. We see this already in their report about Jesus. They are involved in what they are saying about Jesus, but all the time they are still speaking about Jesus. They are meditating, speaking, reflecting about Jesus, holding on to their memory of Him. They remain focussed on Jesus. It is all about their experience, but then the experience of the divine Presence and involvement in their lives as something and Someone outside themselves. They are still, in this dark moment, looking at the divine intervention in their existence.

Here two poles intersect – the divine and the human pole. They are somber, sad and without hope. But they also have been changed by the divine touch, by something, Someone outside themselves. They are still reflecting on God, Jesus, intimacy, power, hope, life.

There is this polar tension between the divine and the human. This is, then, what spirituality is all about – about the polar tension in the relationship between God and humanity. What we experience and what God does are often in a painful conflict.

Jesus does not make it much easier for the two disciples in this tension. He gives no miraculous self-revelation to them. He does no miracles or does not reveal that He is the resurrected one.

He takes the long road and opens the Bible. Let us trace the footsteps of God through the history of salvation. Look back at the divine deeds of God throughout the ages. Reflect on the divine actions long before you were even aware of Jesus. Remember, always remember that this is your salvation – that you are part of God’s great, great deeds throughout all times, part of the community of saints whose collective wisdom speaks about the mystery of God’s powerful, though often inexplicable involvement in human existence. Always live close to this collective wisdom, this understanding of the divine revelation by the many saints of all times. By engaging with them as they speak of God, you will be receiving new life, you will be initiated into the deeper wisdom, entering in ever intenser manner the mystery of God’s relationship with humanity. This is how Jesus travels with them on their spiritual journey in the new dispensation after his resurrection. If you want your broken hearts to be healed, reach out to the witnesses who spoke previously out of their experience of God’s faithfulness and love. After all, it is not “my” will, but the Father’s will which needs to be done. Bitter. The Father’s will can so often transcend our understanding. But so does, thankfully, the divine peace as well – which comes to those who live according to the divine will.

Later, the two understood this better. Then they realized why this difficult road was the better one. As they listened and meditated with Jesus on God’s word, Scripture once again set ablaze a desire in their hearts: “were not our hearts burning in us when He talked to us and opened up Scripture?” Their experience of Jesus before the resurrection and now their experience of the witness of the ages brought about a new mystical experience in them: fire burned in them. They desire for God was rekindled. They were empowered to pray, to reach out to God who has been talking to them in Scripture.

This is, then, what happens when Scripture as the witness of wisdom meets our experiences. What we have encountered in so many of our experiences, gets tested and challenged by what we read in Scriptures, in the words of wisdom, in the words of life. We reflect about who we are and what is happening to us in the light of the wisdom of all ages. And then, often, we begin to see how God really acts. And we begin to realize with awe how differently God often acts – against all expectations, even against our own will. We understand that our despair is the result of our own shortsightedness and our own servility to our will. And, as the flame of desire burns in us, we realize that our salvation is not to be found in our experiences, or in what we want, but in the divine Love who enters our experiences and opens our eyes for the new life which God gives, for the different, compassionate and unusual new ways in which God often acts. Without this light of Scripture, without the wisdom of the saints of all times, we will not survive.

Our faith is irrevocable and intricately linked to the powerful words of wisdom which God has given us as the light on our spirituality journey. Through them we are empowerd, we are given new hope, our desire for the divine Presence is rekindled. When we have come to the end of the road, in a mysterious way, God touches our innermost being and brings us to pray.

When human experience and the divine word interact. On yearning for God.

Spirituality is about faith experienced. It can also be described as “lived” faith.

But the word experience may be misleading, because it could easily deceive people to think that Sprituality is about emotions or feelings. And this creates apprehension, because we know too well that feelings can be misleading – that what one feels at moments of ecstacy may disappear the next moment when one experiences dark and unhappy feelings.

Spirituality surely includes emotions, but the experience in spirituality is about much more than emotions. The two disciples in the Emmaus episode are involved with all their feelings in what overfalls them after the message about the empty grave. They are deeply immersed in their mutual conversation. In Luke 24:17 they respond to Jesus’ question abouth what they are discussing by standing still with somber faces. They then talk with Jesus – not about their feelings so much as about their experience. But indirectly we see also how they felt about Jesus. They recount the past moments they experienced with Jesus. It is a story which reveals how deeply committed they were to Jesus and how they experienced Him as a powerful messenger of God. “He was powerful in word and deed,” a “prophet.” They admired Him for his piety, his journey with God, his spirituality. They were impressed and astonished by all these things. They experienced Him as the hope for Israel’s salvation. He was for them the embodiment of all God’s promises to God’s people of all ages. Not only their feelings, but all of their experiences and encounters with Jesus fill their memory and their faith.

And then the disaster of the cross and the empty grave overfell them (verses 20 and 24) – with, the greatest setback: Jesus is nowhere in sight.

So they share their emotions, but also their wider experiences with Jesus. They speak about their hopes when they were with Jesus, but also about their disillusionment when He was no longer to be seen. All their experiences of their years with Jesus are shared with the stranger who walks the way with them. Jesus touched their hearts, formed their lives, shaped their expectations, inspired them with hope, but now their hearts, previously so committed to his cause, were broken, in pieces, shattered. They are without hope, shocked, but they also experience that they no longer know what to think. They had seen the Light, but now they are in darkness. They hoped, but now they are leaving all their aspirations and expectations behind to return to their previous, old existence. They have experienced for years the power of Jesus’ presence among them, now they travel without Him, with empty hearts, with only their empty words which they share with each other.

What an “experience – these ups and downs, these light and dark moments in the spiritual journey!” One does not wish this nightmare with the bitter end, their disillusionment, even to one’s enemies. It must have been cruel to them as intimate disciples of Jesus. After the intensity of the divine presence in the live and person of Jesus, there is this void, this loneliness. They are experiencing the valleys of despair after the mountain – moments of glory. This is their “experience.” They are not speaking vaguely about some events among them. They are speaking about what happened to them, how deeply they were aware of the divine acts and presence in their recent experiences. They share their spirituality with Jesus: how they experience their faith and how they are experiencing it, also in this desperate journey to Emmaus.

But, see the other side of this picture. The conversation is not only about their experiences. We see this already in their report about Jesus. They are involved in what they are saying about Jesus, but all the time they are still speaking about Jesus. They are meditating, speaking, reflecting about Jesus, holding on to their memory of Him. They remain focussed on Jesus. It is all about their experience, but then the experience of the divine Presence and involvement in their lives as something and Someone outside themselves. They are still, in this dark moment, looking at the divine intervention in their existence.

Here two poles intersect – the divine and the human pole. They are somber, sad and without hope. But they also have been changed by the divine touch, by something, Someone outside themselves. They are still reflecting on God, Jesus, intimacy, power, hope, life.

There is this polar tension between the divine and the human. This is, then, what spirituality is all about – about the polar tension in the relationship between God and humanity. What we experience and what God does are often in a painful conflict.

Jesus does not make it much easier for the two disciples in this tension. He gives no miraculous self-revelation to them. He does no miracles or does not reveal that He is the resurrected one.

He takes the long road and opens the Bible. Let us trace the footsteps of God through the history of salvation. Look back at the divine deeds of God throughout the ages. Reflect on the divine actions long before you were even aware of Jesus. Remember, always remember that this is your salvation – that you are part of God’s great, great deeds throughout all times, part of the community of saints whose collective wisdom speaks about the mystery of God’s powerful, though often inexplicable involvement in human existence. Always live close to this collective wisdom, this understanding of the divine revelation by the many saints of all times. By engaging with them as they speak of God, you will be receiving new life, you will be initiated into the deeper wisdom, entering in ever intenser manner the mystery of God’s relationship with humanity. This is how Jesus travels with them on their spiritual journey in the new dispensation after his resurrection. If you want your broken hearts to be healed, reach out to the witnesses who spoke previously out of their experience of God’s faithfulness and love. After all, it is not “my” will, but the Father’s will which needs to be done. Bitter. The Father’s will can so often transcend our understanding. But so does, thankfully, the divine peace as well – which comes to those who live according to the divine will.

Later, the two understood this better. Then they realized why this difficult road was the better one. As they listened and meditated with Jesus on God’s word, Scripture once again set ablaze a desire in their hearts: “were not our hearts burning in us when He talked to us and opened up Scripture?” Their experience of Jesus before the resurrection and now their experience of the witness of the ages brought about a new mystical experience in them: fire burned in them. They desire for God was rekindled. They were empowered to pray, to reach out to God who has been talking to them in Scripture.

This is, then, what happens when Scripture as the witness of wisdom meets our experiences. What we have encountered in so many of our experiences, gets tested and challenged by what we read in Scriptures, in the words of wisdom, in the words of life. We reflect about who we are and what is happening to us in the light of the wisdom of all ages. And then, often, we begin to see how God really acts. And we begin to realize with awe how differently God often acts – against all expectations, even against our own will. We understand that our despair is the result of our own shortsightedness and our own servility to our will. And, as the flame of desire burns in us, we realize that our salvation is not to be found in our experiences, or in what we want, but in the divine Love who enters our experiences and opens our eyes for the new life which God gives, for the different, compassionate and unusual new ways in which God often acts. Without this light of Scripture, without the wisdom of the saints of all times, we will not survive.

Our faith is irrevocable and intricately linked to the powerful words of wisdom which God has given us as the light on our spirituality journey. Through them we are empowerd, we are given new hope, our desire for the divine Presence is rekindled. When we have come to the end of the road, in a mysterious way, God touches our innermost being and brings us to pray.