Spirituality, emotions and experience

Spirituality is often linked with emotions. It is then seen as a development which reacted against an overemphasis on reason, on intellectuality. Faith, we say, is not only about the brain, but also about the heart.

And this is certainly true. Faith touches not only our understanding, but it also has to do with our feelings.

The problem is that we too often mistake our emotions and feelings with our moods. Then we may easily regard spirituality as something which helps us to get out of our bad moods. Spirtuality, we may then argue, provides happiness, makes us joyful, excited.

This may also be true. Faith has its extraordinary happy moments, its ecstatic times.

But often we can experience inner peace and calm when we are not in a good mood. Biblical characters like Paul exemplify this when they sing songs of praise in prison. We can still, in the difficult times, experience the kindness and love of God, realize that we have been granted the extraordinary gift of faith from above. We “know” it, “realize” it, “experience” it, even though we may not necessarily “feel” it in the happy sense of the word. Experience does not need to imply “feeling” good or happy. Experience means that our faith is a reality, God’s love is with us.

Our faith does not per definition bring us into a good mood. Good feelings may even threaten our faith – because when they disappear, we get frustrated, depressed or confused. Why did I feel so close to God, but now there is a huge distance between us? Have I lost my faith now that I feel gloomy and far from God?

Faith does not come and go like our moods swing between bad and good. Nothing can separate us from God’s love, certainly not our bad moods.

We are as human beings by nature instable and fickle. It is our fate to also by times to feel like we are battling to survive stormy seas. Peter felt it: one moment he ecstatically felt like walking on water, the next moment he was sinking in desperation. And yet, he remained a disciple and continued with the spiritual journey.

Spirituality focuses on faith in God, keeping the eye fixed on the One who leads us to life. It focuses on on Love, on the One who personifies mercy, compassion, care. It has to do with Someone who reaches out to us. Faith means to look up to Him, to experience that my life is not determined by my moods, but by my experience of intimacy, nearness. Someone greater than my emotions is there to be with me.

Thomas A Kempis writes about this in The Imitation of Christ 3.34. He quotes Matthew 6:21-23. 1For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. 22"The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are good, your whole body will be full of light. 23But if your eyes are bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness!

This is the challenge: to look beyond our moods, our fickleness. To look away from my dark depression, from myself. To remember in the moments of sadness to keep an eye on the Son of Man who is the light, the One whom I should desire. Nothing can eclipse this great light of love. As Thomas asks: we need to direct our eye toward the one, never-changing beacon of light – the Christ of faith. If we do, the whole body will be full of light. If we do not, how great is the darkness which overfalls us.