Happiness

The quest for happiness is ingrained in our human nature. As a result there are many desperate attempts in our societies to be happy. In this regard I keep on thinking about a pronouncement by Bono about his concerts. He said he sees thousands of people at his live performances who pretend to be happy, but he knows deep inside they are desperately unhappy.

His words reminded me of the lyrics of Our Lady Peace – a hugely popular Canadian band who, normally can be tough, but always with a bit of happiness suggested in their lyrics. Their song "Happiness is not a fish you can catch" is a fascinating revelation about contemporary existence:

I confess
Everyone is overweight
And I'm obsessed
Talking is just masturbating
Without the mess
Addiction leaves you sad today
& unimpressed
I can't remember all the names because
Everyone you meet today
Is just so fucking vain

Bored again by happiness
All those friends I've (die) lost in there

I'm upset
Happiness is not a fish
That you can catch
Imagination can't resist
This laziness
That pins you down, get on your knees
Everyone you meet today
Is feeling useless & ashamed

What a song. And what a final "note": “Everyone you meet today is feeling useless and ashamed.” This is the face of our world. But even more striking is the “bored again by happiness.” The sort of happiness we do find, is the fleeting one, the temporary moment, the boring experience which leaves us still sadder and useless and ashamed.

In the quest for happiness we avoid anything which can disturb us or distress us. And for many that includes religion. With its focus on sin, its questioning of things we appreciate, its demand for a virtuous life and love for the neighbour, religion seems to be contrary to happiness. And because we long for happiness and desire it here and now, Christianity with its message about future happiness seems to dope us to remain unhappy in our present existence.

Just as natural as our desire is to be happy here and now, just as natural is it that we are doomed to be unhappy. Our bodies, as Thomas Aquinas also said in his Summa Theologica, alone is a reason why we should not be so romantic about happiness in the here and the now – if I may paraphrase his thougths (the overweight en addiction of Our Lady Peace!). Our imperfect knowledge is the reason for many disasaters, wrong actions. And our lack of virtue causes great distress – not only to others, but mostly to ourselves. Even if we desire it deeply, happiness is by our very nature most of the times simply out of our reach.

The truly great understood this. And yet Jesus speaks about a certain kind of happiness that one can experience. He does promise happiness and joy for the future, for sure. But happiness is not a carrot which we have to chase donkey-wise in a fruitless race. Blessed, blessed, Jesus said, are those who... mourn and suffer and are poor. No sentimentality here. No romantic pink roses and white lilies. No boredom. In the hardness of life, in the deep suffering, one can discover inner peace. In the presence of the simple words of Christ, on the mountain of peace and quiet, where life is made calm by his loving nearness. Now, in the poverty of their simple home, in the scorching heat of Palestine, away from the grand temple, now can one come to rest in simplicity of existence away from evil.

Surely Jesus also speaks about future happiness. Jesus spoke to his followers about the coming happiness in the kingdom of the Father – when we shall be in perfect harmony and happiness. We grow towards a greater experience of joy, we live a life of joy amidst suffering, always maturing in our understanding of how frail, but how real happiness can be – even when we have to embrace our suffering. But we also know from the gospel that there will be a time that our joy will be completed in love, given to us in all its fullness. In the meantime, we have to travel, we are involved in a spiritual journey which in itself a happy matter. A treasure hunt. Finding the moments of joy in unexpected and expected places.

All this is not about the happiness of the fleeting, good moments, the “highs” which we have when we experience good things. They are fleeting, they are over – ever so quickly. It is about another kind of joy.

It is the joy of being part of God’s eternal world and holy space. There is a quiet place where we can live in the divine presence. It is the desert of the prophets, where they go to hear the eternal, life creating word. It is the desert of the monks, where they go in retreat to find union with God. It is the harsh desert of our world today which God loves so passionately and which we need to make a place of beauty again. It is a place where love abounds. It is a place of happiness.